Sunday, 3 January 2016

Not My New Year Goals

Two-thousand and Sixteen with glitter

I remember reading something a while back which said never tell people your goals because it makes it harder to achieve them. This makes a lot of sense to me, it lets you have 30 seconds of someone telling you how amazing it would be and how great you are, then around 10 minutes of you on a high and then you float back down to earth and don’t think about it for a while. Therefore not achieving anything.

This is why I have decided not to write a ‘new year goals’ post as it will just not give me the motivation to actually achieve them. Yes I have told my boyfriend and a handful of people, but I feel that this is different than telling everyone I know and then everyone who reads this blog. I know what my goals are and they are mine to achieve.

Fireworks photos

2015 was not the one for me, there were a lot of things I felt went wrong last year. One of my first plans was to leave my current job by June…that did not happen – because I told too many people! It still hasn’t happened, but it’s just made me hungrier to get where I want to be. 

Leaving a job that you’ve had for a very long time is a daunting prospect and one that I know I have to do or I will be miserable. The reason I haven’t left yet is because of pure terror of being rubbish at any other job! But I need and want to use my degree even if it’s just a little bit, as in my current job it feels like going to Uni was a complete waste of time. 

I also had a lot of personal problems, mainly lack of confidence in myself after leaving university and not getting a graduate job straight away. This is a huge thing, as I’ve seen so many people I went to university with in jobs that aren’t in retail, which I crave so badly! I want a ‘proper job’ – I know I know, some people think retail is a proper job and that’s fine, because to them it is their proper job/career! But for me it isn’t, I’ve worked in retail since I was 16 – I’m now 24. I’ve worked in this industry for 8 years as well as going to college and finishing university. By this point in my life I want to work somewhere that isn’t a shop, I want to know what it's like to work in an office or to work freelance etc etc.

Great firework photograph

I also felt very anxious last year about a lot of social situations, which did not help in any way shape or form. I’ve never been very good at putting myself out there and living for the moment -I've always been a little bit scared. I have now realised I have to push myself to be able to get where I want to be or I will be sat on the same sofa, in the same room for the rest of my life.
I have also been very terrible with nurturing my friendships. It is harder when you grow older, as people you know start having different lives it is hard to keep up with everything and to organise meet ups and nights out as everyone’s schedule is so different. It's not like college or school anymore where you could just hang out for hours on any night of the week and eat pizza and chat about nothing in particular. 

I feel like it is increasingly difficult to achieve goals and aims, which is a shame, but when you do achieve them you know that you have absolutely worked your butt off to get there! It’s not often you get handed things on a plate, so well done to anyone that achieves just one goal this year let alone a million that some people have. Even if that goal is to buy that new pair of jeans or shoes that make you feel 1 million dollars, you can do it! 

I have a lot of things to do this year, it's going to be a challenge and I will probably cry quite a lot but I know I will also laugh and smile a lot too. I will do things this year, I’ve decided that and I will keep to it. 

Come at me 2016!

Happy New Year


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